Parents Need Love

The Drop Off: A Michigan Love Story

freewarren — Tue, 17 Jun 2025 23:49:53 +0000

Parenthood doesn’t come with a blueprint. It looks different for everyone, but if there’s one thing we can agree on, it is all-consuming. And if you don’t prioritize your mental health, it will affect how you parent.

The old phrase “it takes a village to raise a child,” captures it best. Because when mommy or daddy need a break, together or apart, having a reliable sitter to drop off the kids is essential. Ann Arbor, Michigan native Melissa Hansberry knows the importance of the drop-off and taking time to decompress.

Melissa met her husband at their alma mater Clark Atlanta where they built the foundation of their relationship brick by brick. They both enjoy traveling and after graduation, they decorated their passports with stamps from over 10 countries. But it was the charm of Michigan, that made it undeniable where they would have to get married.

The restaurant where they wed is different now, but in a full circle moment, Melissa revisits the place they took their vows for an intimate dinner.

“We had dinner at the restaurant where we were married nine years ago. It’s just a special place for me because it’s where I grew up. It’s my home.”

Where To Go After You’ve Dropped Off The Kids

In her free time, Melissa likes to shop, catch a movie, visit the spa or stop by the local eateries for all of the Michigan must-haves. It’s a form of self-care for the loving mother. During our candid convo, she recommended a few spots that are more than enough to make anyone pack up and visit Michigan.

Puffer Reds

If you believe in retail therapy and are a self-proclaimed sneaker head, Puffer Reds, in Ypsilanti, will be the ultimate shopping destination for you. You’ll be ahead of the trends with the newest and hottest gear found at this local Black-owned gem. Between their unique kicks and swagged out apparel, these fab finds are irresistible purchases.

Bloom Wellness Spa

Treat yourself to The Bloom Wellness Spa in Ann Arbor where relaxation meets luxury. Because what better way is there to relax after dropping off the kids than the spa?

For Melissa, slowing down and “not feeling like everything is in a rush or everything has to get done” brings relief. “Sometimes there’s fun and excitement in having nothing to do,” she added. Which is why she loves visiting the spa with hubby. And Ann Arbor’s Bloom Wellness has a unique touch that makes all other places unable to compete. From their phenomenal massages to deprivation tank that lets your drift into peace and stillness, it’s the perfect place to quiet the mind and relax the body.

ZANA

Drop off the kids and prepare for a night out. Good eats meet good vibes at the swanky Zana restaurant in Birmingham, MI. With a robust drink menu, led by award-winning Mad Mixologist Anthony Escalante, you’ll be transported to a romantic scene under mood lighting and pleasing aesthetic. Chef Benjamin Zemach sprinkled his signature flavor on the savory American menu with European flair. This location is even more special for Melissa, as this is where she was married. The venue space was converted to this delicious haven, but maintained the private space in the back where Melissa and hubby shared their vows.

A Few Honorable Mentions

Zingerman’s

“I know what you’re thinking. I didn’t drop off the kids to get a deli sandwich. But oh, the contrary, peacefully eating a delicious sub without interruption is indeed self-care,” Melissa insists. Zingerman’s doesn’t make just any sandwiches; they make headlines with their delicious eats. This historic and award-winning Delicatessen is a fixture in the community drawing the attention from foodies near and far.

According to Melissa, “It’s really flavorful and the kind of destination that people come from all over the state to get. It’s one of the most famous places to eat.”

Gallup Park

Michigan is full of serene green areas like Gallup Park to catch up on some quiet time while the kids are away. This popular Ann Arbor recreation area is located on the Huron River and Geddes Pond, and bridges other small islands via scenic walkways. Reconnect with nature and yourself along one of the mile long trails perfect for walking, running, jogging or roller blading.

Veteran’s Memorial Park

Day dates with yourself or your partner are needed. Whether you’re visiting alone or with a loved one, Veteran’s Memorial Park is a local attraction that draws in thousands of people for a glimpse at its breathtaking fountains. On the other end of the park, you can pay respects to those who served the country at one of the memorials on the other end.

While Michigan is home for Melissa, she advocates it to be somewhere that everyone should experience. “It creates a charm, synergy, and just lasting impact on your heart. Whether the history, the sites or hidden gems it can bring out such a great mood.”

A Reflective Reset

Melissa is able to lean on her partner and vice versa – and while they prioritize alone time, quality time helps them both function as better parents.

“Making time for each other is still top priority. We don’t skip over that. It was us before it was, us with our daughter. And do not mean that in a way that’s disrespectful to our child, but just in a way that’s kind of like when we make time for our marriage and our relationship then we do so much better as a family and we’re so much happier as a family.”

Being on the same page has allowed Melissa and her husband’s marriage to thrive.

“If I’m neglecting my self-care or if my husband is, we can tell it by our attitudes – by how we respond to one another, by our communication, by how we’re getting along. Like, he can tell, if I’m more irritable, I’m irritable with [our daughter] I’m more just combative,” she explained.

“That time for us to recharge just makes us get on the same page. It not only helps our relationship, but I think it helps us be better parents and be on the same page about how we parent her.”

Flying with My Toddler and Infant: Here’s How We Made It

freewarren — Wed, 04 Jun 2025 14:16:00 +0000

“Impossible.” That’s what I said to my husband when he suggested I fly from New York to Indiana with our two children alone. We’d just purchased a kid leash for my three-year-old who ran out of the Newark airport and almost into oncoming traffic during our last trip. And that was with two of us. I was not going to take that journey again outnumbered by children, even if one of them was an infant who slept for half the day.

But a series of circumstances, including trying and failing to secure safe and sufficient housing, job opportunities for my husband and New York trying its best to kick my ass, the solo-parent, two kid trip became less of a suggestion and more of a necessity.

So I did it. With my five month old strapped to my chest and a death grip around my toddler’s wrist, I flew from JFK to IND alone and it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. In fact, it wasn’t bad at all. Some of it was pre-planning (traveling before they’re over-tired) and some of it was taking advantage of the good luck that seemed to follow me that day. Summer is here. The kids are out of school. If you have to fly alone with your children, here are some things to consider.

Check Your Bags

I’m a carry-on girl. When I arrive at my destination, I want to grab my stuff and run out of the airport as soon as possible. That means bypassing baggage claim. But carrying bags and babies would have been unthinkable. So I checked the carseats and the carry on and felt more capable with two free hands.

Ask About the Family Line

There’s no line more boring for kids than the security check at TSA. But some airports have a line specifically designated for families. Even if they don’t, make desperate eye contact with the right agent and they might let you jump ahead of a few people.

Use What You’ve Got

The airport can be a fascinating place for a young person. If you have a bit of a wait before you board, use that opportunity to explore. Play Eye Spy, go on an impromptu scavenger hunt. If your kid has some excess energy, find an empty corridor and let them run until their heart’s content. My son was fascinated with something as simple as watching a shuttle bus. It kept him still and engaged for nearly an hour.

Don’t Catastrophize

I have a tendency to imagine the absolute worst when it comes to being left alone with my two children. I keep being shown, time and time again, that while it might not be preferred, it’s easier than I think it will be every time. Also, if I have calm energy, my children will generally match it.

There Will Be Acts of Kindness

Much of the anxiety mothers feel when traveling is the judgement they’ll receive from others. There will be plenty of that but more importantly, there will also be people–mostly other women and mothers–who will extend grace and kindness. For me, it was the mom who shared her children’s toys to occupy my toddler. And the older women (with grown, kids) who offered to carry bags or pick up things I’d dropped while moving with two children. At JFK, there was a Black TSA agent who was hollering at everyone. But when I passed her, babies in tow. She said, ‘Ok Mama, right this way,” ushering me into the next phase of the wait. People will go out of their way to help you or just be encouraging. Take advantage.

Use the Devices

Some of us have strict rules about the time we allow our children to watch screens. I get it. After a while, I swear that the screens negatively affect my toddler’s behavior. But there are times that call for flexibility. Traveling is one of them. Even if you don’t want to introduce a whole iPad, letting your child get creative with your phone can work wonders. My son entertained himself for more than an hour recording himself singing songs in my voice memos app and listening back to the sound of his own voice. He was quiet, contained and not disturbing anyone else. A win for all.