Tavia Mapp-Deterville Motherly Love Is Unconditional

Tavia Mapp-Deterville had a gut feeling about her youngest child Hunter. According to the mom of two, her son’s play habits were different. ”All the kids his age were really talking and playing with each other and he had no interest,” she explained. Combined with “terrible tantrums” and delayed speech, she soon learned Hunter was autistic. 

Motherhood has been a journey for Tavia. The boutique Public Relations Agency owner had her first child at 17. “I was single, still navigating graduating high school, trying to figure out who I was as a teenage mom and as a person, helping my mom raise my sisters, and relying on family for support. All of this came with the challenge of choosing not to go away to college and immediately having to work and attain childcare.”

Those days are long gone. Now 35, the loving mom, wife and businesswoman, is in a solid relationship, is financially stable, and has a clearer sense of self. 

“My daughter grew up with me,” she expressed, “I often regret not being the mom to her that I am to Hunter. Hunter has two involved present parents and my daughter never had that. Despite it, she is an amazing sister. College graduate, gainfully employed, living on her own, great friend and person. I am the proudest of my children. My biggest accomplishments to date.”

Hunter, now 10, was diagnosed with autism at 3-years-old. ”It was a fight and costly.” Autism tests can range from $1,200 to $5,000 without insurance. But Tavia made it happen, says reports. But that was only half the battle. “I then had to wait for months to get the results.” 

Hunter’s diagnosis made him eligible to receive services from OPWDD and the DOE, such as speech and OT therapy at school. 

In the Black community it is especially prevalent to label a child “special” but avoid actual diagnosis, Tavia shared some signs all parents can look out for.

“While signs and symptoms differ amongst children, echolalia or repeating words or phrases, extreme distress to change, meltdowns, and making friends.”

With autism being recognized on mainstream levels, more awareness about the neurodevelopmental condition makes it easier to understand. A major misconception Tavia says about autism is the belief people with autism aren’t smart.

“Hunter loves numbers and math and literally score better than most kids his age. On his 3rd grade State Math exam, he was 4 points away from a perfect score. Also, early intervention is important for kids especially those not high on the spectrum. Don’t ignore the signs. Get your child tested.”

It’s important to teach tolerance and understanding at a young age so child can develop interpersonal skills with all types of children. 

“Parents can teach their children about other children with autism by first fostering an open and respectful environment where differences are embraced. Start by explaining what autism is in simple terms, focusing on how it might affect someone’s behavior or communication but emphasizing that every person, regardless of differences, deserves kindness and respect. Use real-life examples, stories, or videos featuring children with autism to help illustrate how individuals may experience the world differently. Encourage empathy by talking about how it might feel to face challenges in communication or social situations. Teach inclusive behaviors, such as patience and understanding, and explain how their peers with autism may need extra support or space at times. Lastly, encourage your child to ask questions and show curiosity, reinforcing the value of kindness and acceptance toward everyone, no matter their abilities.”